Tales of the Time: Alok Kumar Satpute, Dr Ram Sharma, Shail Agrawal.

Tales Of the Time

In a shop

Son – Papa! I want this packet of noodles.

Papa – No beta, this is a junk food. You may be ill by eating this.

Son – Mummy please!

Mummy–No beta, papa is telling the truth. This is really a harmful product for your health.

Son – But on the T.V., the company says it nutritious.

Papa – beta, to sell their products companies tell lies.

Son – No, it is impossible. I think both of you are telling lies to save your money.

Status

Customer – Bhaisaheb, please show me a use and throw pen costing rupees two or three only.

Shopkeeper – Look this one. This is a very good and popular branded pen. You can’t find smooth and good looking pen like this anywhere and its price is only twenty rupees.

Customer – Are Bhaisaheb, I want a use and throw pen its price should not be more than two or three rupees.

Shopkeeper – Look this one. This is also a branded pen and price is not so much , only ten rupees.

Customer – Are yaar, I’m telling you again and again that I just want a use and throw pen, price should be two or three rupees, but you are showing me expensive pens and wasting my time.

Shopkeeper – For your kind information, I want to say that we don’t keep cheap pens in our shop and our customers are not from low status.

Customer – It means, I dare not to buy a pen from your shop and my status is not as your customer?

Shopkeeper – No doubt about this.

Love

Judge – ‘‘How can you say that you love your wife very much?’’

Accused–‘My lord! I don’t beat my wife. It proves itself that I love my wife very much’

Address

Girl – ‘‘Sir, you are looking very handsome like a film star.’’

Man – ‘Oh really? My wife too says this’

Girl – ‘‘Are brother, are you married?’’

Man – ‘Aye, I have a son too.’

Girl – ‘‘Then uncle bye… bye …’’

Slavery

Master- ‘‘On your request, I had released you but you have come back to me…why?’’

Slave – ‘Sir, I had been released by you, but I could not release from my own mentally of slavery, so kindly make me your slave again.’

Insecurity

First Muslim – Miyaan, why are you collecting chanda (subscription) for a Hindu festival, don’t you know that worship of statues is strictly prohibited in Islam ?

Second Muslim- Bhaijaan in this matter I just want to say- In India Jan hai to jahan hai.

Alok Kumar Satpute

An established name in contemporary Hindi writings , here he has translated few of his own short stories, which are recognized for their statement and punch.

PAIN OF A FATHER
The father who brought up his son well, has become a burden for his son now; eyes damp, no teeth, pains in hands and feet. He was totally dependent upon his son. He needed help in walking, taking bath and many more. So when old person said anything to his son, he became irritated. This has become a daily schedule. The old person has to bear all these things .

One day, the father reminded his son “ You didn`t give me medicine today, Son!“

“ How much, I can remember“, the son answered.

“ Remember one thing only, Son! You have to grow old also one day`, old person cried

SELECTION OF A SUITABLE CANDIDATE
An interview was going on in headquarter for the selection of a suitable candidate because elections were very near. The leader of the party was asking only a question,“ Why should I provide you the ticket“?
All the gathered candidates answered it differently.
The first candidate said, “I have spent all my time in social field and in the service of the people. These persons will support me. I can win this seat easily. ”
The second one said, “I have always been faithful to the party and served the party with full dedication”
The third one cleared, “I have helped the party in every kind of work like booth capturing etc“
The fourth one said, “I have full faith in party president`s feet. I want to enter in politics only to serve him. Given the ticket. I will continue serving him in the same way“
On the basis of merit and ability the fourth candidate was found most suitable.

Dr Ram Sharma

ADDRESS-C-26,SHRADHAPURI PHASE2 ,KANKERKHERA, MEERUT CANTT-250001, U.P. ,INDIA


Impossible to please

A ” Husband Shopping Centre” opened in the town, where a women could buy the husband of her choice; it was laid out in five floors,with the men increasing in positive attributes by each floor as one would climb up the floor. The only rule was, once you opened the door of any floor, you must choose from that floor only, and cannot go back and revisit any floor once they exited.
So all sorts of unmarried women of different ages rushed in as soon as the doors opened.
On the first floor; sign said ” These men have jobs and love kids,”
The Women read the sign and said, ” Well that’s better than not having jobs, or not loving kids, but wonder, what ‘s further up!”
So up they went.
2’nd floor sign said- ” These men have high paying jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking.”
Humnn…they said but lets see what’s further up!”
So up they reached to the third floor-
” These men have high paying jobs, are extremely good looking, love kids and help with the house-work.”
” Wow!”, They said, ” Very tempting, but there must be more choice on the next floor! .”
And up they went to the fourth floor. ” These men have high paying jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework, and have a strongly romantic nature also.”
” Oh, we could marry them immediately but wonder, what must be awaiting us further up?”
Up to the fifth floor they ran, where the door sign boldly displayed,
” This floor is just to prove that women are impossible to please. Please exit the building and have a nice day!”

Children were well behaved and loving, but boy was bit more spoiled , bit more demanding and dominating. Will not let sister play with any toy. In spite of parents bringing equal amount of gift and toys for both of them , girl was always left empty handed , as the boy will not bring out his toy till he will break the girl’s toy and if girl wanted to play he used to say no this is not your, you cannot play with this . This is mine. Yours is broken and is in the bin. Poor girl also used to swallow her tears and leave the matter there only.

One day Father could not tolerate her daughter’s silent tears any more and asked the boy if you do not like your sister, will not give her any toy then we will give her away to the forest hermit because it is obvious you do not need her.

Boy was really frightened then, pondered for a moment and gave all her toys to the sister.
He went then straight to his father and asked -Can you give me to the forest hermit now!
This time sister was more frightened than him and returned everything.

Shail Agrawal